‘Tis the season for everyone to get married. Engagements are happening left and right, and my friend and I are jokingly sending each other screen shots of our Instagram accounts, with laughing comments of, “how many couple pics can you see on my insta rn?”
I swear…if I had a dollar for every “forever alone” message or comment I’ve gotten in the past 3 months, I could afford to drop out of college. Well, not quite. But you get the point.
During this romantic season where everyone is finding the love of their life and committing to marriage, there are mixed feelings for those who are dating, already in a marriage, or single.
If you are single, this time sucks.
This message is for all my girl friends out there who feel hopeless, lonely, or hurt. Who feel hopeless that there is no one out there for them, who feel hurt by failed relationships
in the past, and who hurt because they feel like no one loves them.
I encourage you:
Wait For the One.
Dear, do. not. settle. Wait for the one. Wait for the one who prays for you. Wait for the one who strives to love you like God does. Wait for the one who tells you that you are beautiful when you least feel like it. Wait for the one who is gracious toward your faults. Wait for the one who earns your trust. Wait for the one who shares the desires of your heart. Wait for the one who challenges you. Wait for the one who inspires you. Wait for the one who will selflessly love your children. Wait for the one who will wake up early to defrost your car. Wait for the one who will smile at every stupid thing you say. Wait for the one who will never get tired of making you see your worth.
Wait for the one who sees you the way God sees you.
Wait for the one who does these things, because you deserve it. Wait for the one, because God will provide you with what you need, and abundantly more.
There is hope and joy in waiting. It is a season of utter reliance and trust on the Lord.
—> Psalms 33:20; Psalms 37:7
Pray for the One.
Pray for your husband to be the one that I described. Pray for you future struggles. Pray for provision. Pray that God would provide you with the man of your dreams. Pray that God will prepare you for your future spouse. Pray for God’s will in this facet of your life. He will bless you beyond what you can imagine.
When you pray, you are relinquishing responsibility to God.
“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4
Don’t be Anxious about the One.
Dear, it is not your responsibility to find your husband. It is not your responsibility to be the best you can be every day in order to get his attention. It is not your obligation to put makeup on and mask your insecurities. It is not your job to fix every problem about yourself so that someone will like you. It is not on you to get a boy to love you.
The reality is, that there is a man out there who will approach you, who will pursue you, and who will love you at your worst. It is not on you to make this happen. The God of the universe is orchestrating His plan for you so perfectly.
Relinquish that burden to the Lord.
You can trust in God’s unfailing love.
Trust in His Timing for the One.
God has an intricate plan for you. If he hasn’t presented someone in your life for marriage yet, trust in His perfect plan. There is an endless amount of reasons
as to why it isn’t in God’s timing yet, and it is burdensome to take it
upon yourself to try and figure out why. However, it is a good time to reflect. It is a perfect time to draw closer to God than you ever have been before. Seek Him romantically. He will fulfill that void. Jesus has chased you down since the day of your existence–pursuing you, loving you, wooing you. He gave himslf up for you. His heart was broken for you. Isn’t that the greatest love story we can
“Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the grave” (Psalms 16:9).
Don’t Listen to Society about the One.
I think that we all compare our relationships with the idea that society has for us. All of the romantic comedies, the love stories, the nonfiction books. They have grand love stories. Do not use this as a model for your love life.
Those stories are built on lust, beauty, and sexuality. Your story will have such greater significance because it is built on God’s eternal love. And the bondage between you and your future man will be a Holy one.
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeing; but a woman who fears the lord is to be praised” (Proverbs 31:31).
You have an author that is more unique, more powerful, and more imaginative than any author on earth. So be excited. The artist that has orchestrated your life perfectly up until this point will continue to paint the most beautiful picture of your future. And it will be more colorful and intricately designed than
you ever could have imagined.
Your love story is being intricately designed by an author more creative than any human being on earth.
Know that God is the First One.
Dear, God is the first one. He has pursued you since the day you were born.
“For your Maker is your Husband–the Lord Almighty is his name.” (Isaiah 54:5)
God wants you to delight in Him as a bride.
“For as a young man marries his virgin bride, so your builder marries you, and as a bridegroom is happy in his bride, so your God is happy with you” (Isaiah 62: 5).
There is no one else who romance you, love you, and cherish you as much as He does. If you aren’t feeling that right now, ask Him to show you. And He will. I pray that you will realize that God’s love is more delightful than any human love. Rejoice and delight in Him. In this time of waiting, draw closer to God’s love. He will pour his love down on you like rain, and you will feel the warmth of His embrace.
And when you feel Hiss love, have a party! In God’s presence, every day deserves a wedding celebration: “Because God delights in you… your land will be like a wedding celebration” (Isaiah 62:4, MSG).
There is someone out there for you.
There is, dear. I promise. If God has called you to marriage, he will provide the one you need. And I urge you to have hope in the reality of that. Don’t be harsh on yourself and tell yourself that you aren’t good enough because your past relationships have failed or because you have never felt loved by someone.
God sees no flaw in you. In His eyes, you are perfect. You are blameless and pure, no matter your past mistakes. He has a love more faithful than the boy who broke your heart. He has spiritual kisses sweeter than wine.
Embrace being single. Draw nearer to your creator. Let Him be your romance. His love story is the only one you need. Live in God, love others, pray, and trust in His timing. One day you will look back and realize how amazing God’s plan is; you will thank Him for every heartache, every broken road, and every lonely night that led you to the man you married.
God bless the broken road that led me straight to you.
God courts you the way He courts His people in Israel: “I’m taking her into the wilderness where we had our first date, and I’ll court her. I’ll give her bouquets of roses. I’ll turn Heartbreak Valley into Acres of Hope” (Isaiah 2:15).
God wants you as much as He wants the people of Israel, when He says: “I’ll marry you for good–forever! I’ll marry you true and proper, in love and tenderness. Yes, I’ll marry you and neither leave you nor let you go. You’ll know me, God, for who I really am” (Hosea 2:18,20).